Okay, internet, HI, HELLO, I APOLOGIZE FOR MY ABSENCE TODAY. I have emails I need to answer and comments full of awesome that I haven't replied to and I don't really have any defense for myself except for that I got. Er. I got...idea-fied, this thing, my brain, sometimes I get ideas and I fall in love and they eat me and I'm not talking about it because I'll jinx
it but just, with the handwaving and the general insanity and the not having the focus for anything other than, you know. Meandering. Story. Things.
MY POINT BEING: SORRY, I SUCK, ALL OF THE THINGS, TOMORROW, I WILL DO THEM. Probably when I have less of a headache.
If you want assurance of the fact that I was completely out of it today, here are some things that happened, all of which make it clear that it is give-up-on-today time, which I will be doing promptly after I hit post:
1) Weeks ago sorrynotsorry
(SUPREMELY AWESOME BEING THAT SHE IS) found and brought to me some hazelnut chocolate spread that didn't have dairy in it, because I am allergic to dairy and have thus missed out on Nutella my whole life, and my bitterness over that fact, it was deep, it was so deep. And I LOST IT, I LOST THE AWESOME PACKETS FULL OF GOODNESS BEFORE I COULD TRY THEM, and then today I found them again and, mid-paroxysms of glee over HOLY FUCK NUTELLA IS DELICIOUS, I tripped over my dog and fell. And landed. On the ground. With my face. In the piece of Nutella toast.
2) I absentmindedly started a tumblr that has no things in it because I DON'T ACTUALLY KNOW HOW TO USE TUMBLR, I don't even know how I ended up on the setup screen, I just kind of clicked some things, it was like highway blindness, and then I blinked and had a tumblr
. Here is what I have done with it so far: stared at the "Maybe you should try posting something!" screen. Closed the tab.
3) Had a Danny Williams moment involving rage over the instructions "Tear here" on a tape dispenser to the point that I actually took a photo on my iPhone to post because WHAT IDIOT DOESN'T KNOW TO THAT YOU NEED TO TEAR TAPE, WHAT KIND OF DIRECTION EVEN IS THAT, made angry noises about it to everyone near me, and then realized that it was just the clear tape dispenser sitting on top of something else that said "tear here." Felt like an asshole.
4) SOMEHOW MANAGED TO FLING A BRA OUT OF MY LAUNDRY AND INTO A LARGE STACK OF PLASTIC CUPS, WHICH ARE NOW EVERYWHERE.
5) On finding a mysterious football diorama of unknown origin in the supply closet of the...law firm...where I work (DON'T ASK, IT'S A MYSTERY), and while overcome with various story ideas and too confused by the diorama's existence to actually engage my brain-to-mouth filter:BossLady
: What is
: I have no idea, what the hell.BossLady
: How did it get in here? Who would leave that here? Why would that be at a law firm? Me
: I think we should put a Post-It on it that says 42. BossLady
: ...why? Me
: Because obviously it's the answer to life, the universe, and everything, what else could it be? BossLady
: Was that supposed to make it clearer for me?Me
: MAYBE IT'S A VERY SMALL PORTAL TO NARNIA