gyzym: (RDJ's smirk WILL GET YOU PREGNANT)
Title: History, Repeating Itself (Chapter Six)
Rating: R/NC-17
Pairing: Holmes/Watson
Warnings: Alcohol and marijuana use, general debauchery, copious use of coarse language.
Spoilers: None, except for Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, and Chapter Five of this story.
Author's Notes: This is a fill for an AWESOME prompt at [livejournal.com profile] shkinkmeme; both the prompt and the fill thread can be found here. I will continue posting the chapters bit-by-bit there and then archiving them on my journal for the duration of this story.
Chapter Summary: John Watson can't sleep, has vivid dreams, makes a mistake and gets his ass handed to him.

Chapter Six: On Paying Better Attention to the Meanings of Dreams )
gyzym: (POOOOOOOOORN)
Oh, look. THE PROMISED SEQUEL. Ask and YOU SHALL RECEIVE, FANDOM :D

Also, I clearly need to invest some time in finding Holmes icons.


Title: A Study in the Art of Proper Reciprocation
Pairing: Holmes/Watson
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers: None
Author's Note: This is the immediate sequel to Things That Bear Repeating. If you would like to read this without reading that, all you need to know is this: in that fic, Holmes falls in the Thames on a case and nearly dies, and Watson gives him a lecture on the value of his life. Uh...involving his dick.
Summary: Holmes wakes to a mystery that is a decided pleasure to solve.

It is the natural instinct of man, upon waking, to open his eyes and determine his surroundings. )
gyzym: (Default)
Dear iTunes,

Um, it's not that I don't appreciate what you're getting at, but "Low Rider" is not appropriate for Holmes/Watson porn. It's just not.

I see what you did there,
Me

--

Dear Holmes,

STOP DITHERING ABOUT AND GET WATSON'S COCK IN YOUR MOUTH ALREADY. I know you're brilliant and verbose and everything but HURRY IT UP.

Please to be making with the whoopie,
Me

--

Dear Everyone Who Asked for A Sequel to That River Fic,

YOU ASKED AND I AM IN THE PROCESS OF MAKING SURE YOU RECEIVE. See above in reference to the delay.

It's coming I swear YOU ARE ALL AWESOME,
Me
gyzym: (Default)
Dear Campus Internet,

Look, I promise not to READ that porn I wrote last night. I just want to answer the awesome comments people left for me. They made my Monday so much better, Campus Internet; I just want to say thanks, NO PORN INVOLVED. If I decide to read the porn, I will pull up the copy I saved on my hard drive. Or, you know, REMEMBER WRITING IT.

Sdfkskdmdk,
Me

--

Dear Stomach,

Now you're hungry? Now? We drove past 15 decent places to get food on the way here and you were all "No, no no, don't even think about it, that is a horrifyingly bad idea." Now my options are cafeteria food and vending machine fare, so you are just going to have to wait.

I hope this teaches you a lesson about the consequences of being a whiny bitch.

This is indeed what my middle finger looks like,
Me

--

Dear Professor,

I cannot tell you how irritating I find it that you make attendance for this class compulsory when ALL YOU DO is read the online book notes word for fucking word. So no, I don't feel guilty about using your class to read and write fanfiction. In fact, it is your fault.

Try some original content,
Me

--

Dear Sherlock Holmes,

WOW, YOU REALLY MAKE A MESS OF THINGS WHEN YOU MOVE INTO SOMEONE'S BRAIN, DON'T YOU. It's pretty adorable, actually. Don't stop.

I love you allllmost as much as Watson does,
Me

--

Dear Robert Downey Jr., Jude Law, and [livejournal.com profile] niagarawoman,

Okay, guys. I work at a law office. At law offices, there are documents called requests for proposal, abbreviated to RFPs. Today, I was told that I get the lovely task of editing, reformatting and processing an entire host of these things. This in and of itself is not a problem; I am more than happy to do the job for which they pay me.

NO, THE PROBLEM IS HOW MANY QUESTIONS I ASKED MY BOSSES TODAY ABOUT RPF BY MISTAKE. Thank god they don't know what that means; I nearly died of embarrassment the first time and then COULD NOT STOP DOING IT. ARGH.

...But reading that story was still totally worth it,
Me
gyzym: (POOOOOOOOORN)
Hahahaha. So remember how I said that I was finishing that fic I posted a snippet of?

Yes, well. Somehow, along the way, I got distracted by porn. I know, isn't it SHOCKING? Because, ahahaha, I never do that. Ever. Nope.

...Oops?

Oh hai White Collar and Harry Potter peoples; I APOLOGIZE FOR THIS DEVIATION, I AM NOT ABANDONING YOU FOR STEAMPUNKY LOVE I PROMISE. I'm just, uh. You know. Polyfannish? That's a thing, right?

Title: Things That Bear Repeating
Pairing: Holmes/Watson
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Anal sex, fingering. You know, the usual.
Author's Note: A fill for a prompt over at [livejournal.com profile] shkinkmeme; OP wanted nearly drowned Holmes, Watson saving/resuscitating him, and Watson with a bit of a thing for Holmes all wet. Also, WOO, THESE GUYS ARE FUN TO WRITE.
Summary: When Holmes risks his life (again) and nearly dies (again), Watson decides enough is just about enough.

Really, it's not all that surprising when Holmes falls in the river. )
gyzym: (Neal: Modesty)
So...tired...but...must...post...library...sex....

Title: Top to Bottom
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Neal/Peter (implied Neal/Peter/El)
Spoilers: Nope nope, villain of the week is entirely made up.
Warnings: Defiling of a library?
Wordcount: 2351
Summary: Neal Caffrey doesn't place bets without knowing the odds.
A/N: Apologies in advance if I wake up tomorrow morning, am ASHAMED of the horrible pun that is the title of this fic, and change it. FAIR WARNING.

Top to Bottom )
gyzym: (OT3)
HAHAHA. I CLAIM VICTORY OVER GIRL!NEAL.

First: a MASSIVE thank you to [livejournal.com profile] hoosierbitch, who: prompted this, held my hand, held my hand some more, encouraged me madly, waited patiently through my various crises, and TOTALLY DESERVES THIS, SHE PUT MORE WORK INTO IT THAN I DID :D

And second: uh, yes, I am totally using an ABRAHAM LINCOLN QUOTE for the title of my SEXSWAP PORN. I am SO SORRY, Abraham Lincoln. Rolling over in your grave like that can't be comfortable.

Title: Whatever You Are (Be a Good One)
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Peter/Neal/El
Warnings: Sexswap.
Spoilers: Nope!
Summary: Peter should have known better than to let Neal into any situation involving the words "touch nothing."
A Note on Pronouns: This is a sexswap fic. To be more specific: in this fic, Neal is temporarily turned into a woman. Peter narrates this story, and refers to Neal as "he" throughout. This is because Neal's gender identity remains male for the duration of this story. His body is switched by accident and against his will, and he does not think of himself as female; thus, he is not referred to that way. If this were a story in which Neal's gender identity was female, I would of course switch pronouns. Ok? Ok.

[ETA 4/12/10: Having now read [livejournal.com profile] iambickilometer's excellent post on transgender issues in fandom, I have realized that in calling this a genderswap fic, I was making a mistake. This is, in fact, a SEXswap fic, in which Neal changes biological sex, not gender. Apologies! And please do let me know if I've made any other mistakes; as I mentioned in the comments, the last thing I am trying to do with this fic is hurt or offend the transgender community.]

Peter knows it's going to be a bad day when they receive the double finger point immediately upon entering the office. )
gyzym: (Default)
Title: Earned (Or: That One Time With the Taxi)
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Peter/Neal, offscreen OT3
Spoilers: Yeah, through the end of the season.
Warnings: Some D/s dynamic.
Author's Note: Written for [livejournal.com profile] hoosierbitch's post seeking more porn! Man, did everyone provide. I've been writing a ton of comment!fic this week, I'm gonna post all the drabbles here later, but this one ended up being 1200 words long, so it gets its own post.
Summary: "This is stupid," Neal says, and he's right, he's beyond right, but Peter doesn't care; he's been waiting long enough, now.

Earned )
gyzym: (OT3)
Dearest [livejournal.com profile] freaky_zero,

YOU SENT ME AN AWESOME PROMPT ABOUT PETER AND EL FINDING STUFF MISSING FROM THEIR HOUSE, and I started to fill it, and then it turned into this 2,000+ words long thing and took me forever, I AM SORRY! But I finished it and then I could not find your comment to reply to. I do not know if you deleted it or if LJ did BUT HERE IS YOUR STORY. Sorry it kinda ran away with me...

Dearest rest of my friendlist,

THIS IS FOR YOU GUYS ALSO. Thank you all for being SO AWESOME, and responding to my call for fic with more comment win than I could ever have dreamed up. You guys are MADE OF BRILLIANCE and I am flattered and amazed to know all of you and THANK YOU.

Love,
K

Title: Once A Criminal
Rating: That'd be a serious NC-17, folks.
Pairing: Neal/Peter/Elizabeth
Spoilers: Nope.
Warnings: Table!sex?
Summary: Peter and El have a mystery to solve.

'Honey?' El calls from the living room. 'Have you seen the remote?' )
gyzym: (Neal: Modesty)
I was fooling around on the kinkmeme (NOT, as I mistakenly called it in a conversation earlier, the KINMEME, which would be a different meme indeed) yesterday, and I came across a lovely prompt. Anon asked for something involving my favorite OT3 and backpalming or cup-and-balling, a la the hilarious webcast with Tim and Matt.

So! I started this there, and then it turned out to be the morning!sex mentioned in Another Saturday Night. Like that story, this can be read alone, but they are both technically part of the Captain Americaverse.

So: THANKS ANON. YOU'RE AWESOME, WHOEVER YOU ARE.

Title: Dice or No Dice
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Neal/Peter/El
Warnings: Be warned: this is some dirty porn. Fingering, anal sex.
Spoilers : Nope.
Author's Note: Though it can be read alone, this is the immediate prequel to Another Saturday Night; specifically, this is the sex they had that morning.
Summary: Neal's had to abandon the use of many of his more specialized skills; he'll be damned if he abandons this one.

Dice or No Dice )
gyzym: (Neal: Modesty)
Title: Another Saturday Night
Rating: NC-17
Pairing Neal/Peter/El
Warnings: That NC-17 up there is definitely not a joke.
Spoilers: Nope!
Summary: Peter's had a bad night; it's only fair that Neal and Elizabeth let him in on their fun.

Peter wasn't entirely sure what was wrong with him, that he hadn't known his wife of nearly 11 years could move like that, that it hadn't occurred to him to find out. )
gyzym: (Neal: Sheriff)
So! I accidentally wrote 4500 words of White Collar porn! I'm going to go ahead and keep blaming [livejournal.com profile] purple_chalk. And now it's here for you, in all it's totally porntastic glory. Happy...Thursday?

Title: The Right Way to Ruin a Suit
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Neal/Peter/El
Spoilers: Nope.
Warnings: Spanking, handcuffs. Some D/s dynamic. Also, it's definitely earned that NC-17 rating.
Word Count: ~4500
Author's Note: You asked for it, [livejournal.com profile] snegurochka_lee. I hope it's to your liking!
Summary: Peter's right; Neal really does wear too many goddamn clothes.

The Right Way to Ruin a Suit )

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