gyzym: (Steve/Danny b&w)
Riiiight, so. I sat down tonight to write a post-ep, because it's not really an ep for me until I've written something, because I'm nuts. Instead, I spent far too long watching next week's preview over and over, and then, er. Basically "Steve looked tired in this episode" and "what the hell is Steve doing sitting on a bench when there is WATER he could be SPLASHING IN (like the big puppy he is) RIGHT THERE," coalesced into. Uh. Writing a fic that I think is about PTSD without actually using the term PTSD? Kind-of-ish like Hills Like White Elephants, only not about abortion and not actually in anything like the same style and it kind of did its own thing without my go ahead and I'm, uh, reaaaaaaaally no Ernest Hemingway. In any number of ways, literary talent included.

In short: I have a pretty good idea of how this happened, but I don't really have any idea what it is, and I'm posting it. Whatever. BEGONE FROM MY FOLDER, FANFICTION, or something.

leave the weight in this place behind [steve/danny, 1800 words] )
gyzym: (T.Hard w/ cig and skepticism)
Ahahaha, fixed my internet, and then [livejournal.com profile] rrrowr did me a solid (THANK YOU RO THANK YOU RO OH MY GOD THANK YOU) and then I was all, what do you want? And she was all, Arthur/Eames wallsex! And for whatever reason, though I've been blocked on these two for seriously months and months and fucking months, this actually happened. I don't know if/when it will happen again, and my sincere apologies if it's not for awhile--I SWEAR TO GOD I'M TRYING WITH THESE TWO, THEY JUST. Oh man, when they don't talk to me they really do not say a fucking WORD, I don't know what to do with them.

So, uh, right, here's 1500 words of drunk Arthur/Eames established-relationship-ish kind of size kinky PWP? Like, seriously, PWP, and also glossing over the whole most-drunk-people-have-trouble-getting-hard-thing and oh, god, I don't even know, you guys. My apologies for the errors that are probably herein, this is an insomnia fic, and also for the terrible title, and also for the fact that after months of nothing on this front what came out is...this. Augh I don't even I'm going to go try to sleep now RO I LOVE YOU THANK YOU AGAIN.

Dangerous When Loaded, 1500 words, Arthur/Eames, NC-17 )
gyzym: (Can't sleep; write porn!)
1) Tonight's insomnia ficlet, Object Lessons in Gravitational Force, is over at [livejournal.com profile] kissemdanno! ♥

2) Saw Scream 4 tonight. It was, in the true tradition of the Scream films, not even remotely frightening but deeply, almost painfully hilarious. GOD THE WRITING WAS SO BAD, oh, there is nothing I love more than a terrible horror movie. Not that anything will ever top Tommy Wiseau's The House That Drips Blood on Alex (spoiler: the house drips blood on Alex, and not Alex O'Lough, either) for truly epic horror fail, but still. Good times.

3) You know I typed out "Happy Who-turday!" before I actually thought about how that would sound if said aloud?

4) The best rendition of the Passover story ever.

gyzym: (Steve doubts you. He doubts you.)
Right, so, [livejournal.com profile] leupagus and [livejournal.com profile] wheres_walnut and I were talking about nerdy high school Steve, and somehow I accidentally ended up writing a little bit of Curving Like The Ocean Toward You 'verse nonsense. So...here's that!

Sorry, dudes, it's 4 in the morning, that's all I got right now.

Title: Maybe We're Both Too Far Gone
Rating: PG, except for, you know, all the fucking swearing, like always.
Wordcount: ~1900
Summary: A picture's worth a thousand words; a thousand and one, if there's a mullet involved.

Maybe We're Both Too Far Gone )
gyzym: (Journals)
RIGHT SO.

Tonight I shut down gmail and tumblr and LJ and went to go to sleep and wrote a spoken word poem instead! Which is strange to me, you know, because normally poems come to me and then I think about speaking them later, but whatever, this one wasn't like that, it had internal rhymes in it and everything, what the hell. So I finished it and then I went ahead and recorded it, in an LJ voicepost because I have no actual idea how anything other than the word processing software on my computer works. Recorded version is below, text of the poem is under the cut, and you know I think I might actually go to an open mic night somewhere and perform this one, but that might just be 5 AM talking.

Peace out, cool cats, it's bedtime now.



the beauty culture. )
gyzym: (Can't sleep; write porn!)
This is some soppy sappy mushy feel-good three in the morning Steve/Danny nonsense, that's what this is right here. Porn not contained herein, insomnia icon applicable anyway. NO SHAME, NO APOLOGIES, NO REAL EXPLANATIONS. ♥

gathering )
gyzym: (Danny (the face that goes with the tone))
These dreams I keep having, I don't understand:

Steve: Hey, Danny, do you know what 'soothing' is?
Danny: Seriously? What kind of question is that, yes, I know what soothing is, what's with the airquotes, why wouldn't I know that?
Steve: ...because it is an ancient art I learned in my travels of the world?
Danny: You have got to be fucking kidding me.
Steve: *dryhumps*
Danny: WHAT THE HELL
Steve: THIS IS HOW YOU SOOTHE PEOPLE
Danny: NO IT ISN'T, ASSHOLE, STOP THAT, PEOPLE WILL SEE
Steve: SHUT UP AND BE SOOTHED, WILLIAMS.

sdfhdsfhdjf oh subconscious why you so crazy
gyzym: (Lady in white)
jsfhdsf TODAY IS NOT GOING THE WAY IT WAS SUPPOSED TO, because djfhdjskf my family and dsfjhdsfhs oversleeping and sfhdjfdskf THIS REALLY BIZARRE DREAM WHERE I WAS DATING THE HOTTEST GIRL IN THE HISTORY OF TIME FOR LIKE, A YEAR, AND THEN I TURNED AROUND ONE DAY AND SHE WAS A GIANT MONSTER, LIKE SERIOUSLY, SO GIANT, SO MANY ANGRY TEETH, SHE CHASED ME AND TRIED TO EAT ME AND NOT IN A FUN WAY, I THINK MAYBE SOMEONE WAS TRYING TO RUN AN EXTRACTION ON ME. I have so many things to write and so many things to edit and I will be back for real to do all that in an hour or two, this is a driveby post to share a couple of things:

1. via [livejournal.com profile] iamspace:



MOSTLY FOR ALEX'S SMILEY FACE WITH THE GUITAR ABOUT HALFWAY THROUGH. ALSO SCOTTY'S "HEY I AM ON MY PHONE RAWR I AM SUCH AN ADORABLE GRUMPYFACED ASSHOLE" FACE. ALSO GRACE PARK. ALSO DDK. BUT MOSTLY ALEX'S SMILEY FACE OH MY GODDDD HOW IS HE REAL.

2. So last night instead of going to bed I shut down everything except that fucking Disney princess generator! Which, what the fucking shit, why did this program do this to me.

First I did Steve and Danny as princesses: )

Then, because John and Sherlock were on the brain, I did them too: )

And then I was going to do Arthur and Eames, but, in a moment of half-asleep four AM madness, said to myself, "JIZZY, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, YOU WROTE THAT WHOLE FIC WHERE ARTHUR WAS DISNEY PRINCESSES."

So you guys don't get to see the princess version of Eames. You do get to see every princess Arthur was in A Whole New World, though. )

THIS HAS BEEN TODAY'S EPISODE OF "WHY THE HELL DO YOU READ THIS LIVEJOURNAL, OBVIOUSLY GYZYM IS OUT OF HER MIND." Tune in next week for, uh, more of same, although hopefully with increased sleep and decreased fucking princesses. I'm off to clean all of the things and then I will be back, writing Steve/Danny words until the cows come home. I HOPE EVERYONE IS HAVING AN AWESOME SATURDAY ♥!
gyzym: (Can't sleep; write porn!)
Sorry, I just love this icon a lot, and it *would* be relevant if tumblr didn't exist. Or maybe it wouldn't be, because maybe I would be asleep right now, because I WAS TOTALLY GOING TO GO TO SLEEP AND THEN TUMBLR ATE MY MOTHERFUCKING SOUL. FUCK YOU, TUMBLR. FUCK YOU A LOT.

So here's the latest edition of "my dream job is to be a curator of funny shit on the internet," largely courtesy the devil's own website. BUT BEFORE WE DO THAT, WATCH THIS VIDEO, FOUND WHILE I WAS BOPPING AROUND ON VARIOUS SHERLOCK TUMBLRS TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO END THAT FIC EARLIER (which, okay, don't look at me like that, guys, do you know how hard it is to write 95% of a fic and then WAIT 7 MONTHS TO WRITE THE LAST 5%, because if you don't the answer is FUCKING HARD and I was looking to achieve the Sherlock headspace and achieved lols instead, CHRIST, COULD THIS SENTENCE BE LONGER):



No, really, watch it. Even if you've never seen Sherlock, watch it. It is funny on all of the levels.

OTHER THINGS THAT ARE FUNNY ON ALL OF THE LEVELS: )

In conclusion, an image that is both ridiculously accurate and so relevant to my life right now I could weep:



SLEEPING FOR REAL NOW, GUYS. NO MORE TUMBLR. NO INSOMNIA DANNY/STEVE PROBABLY. NO MORE SITTING AWAKE TRYING TO DECIDE IF I SHOULD CHANGE MY JOURNAL NAME FROM "STRAWBERRY WAFFLE BALLS & JALALENO CORNDOG SHRIMPS" TO "SHE GOES OUT AND STEALS THE KING'S ENGLISH." IT. IS. BED. TIME.

HAPPY APRIL 2nd! I CAN NOW TELL YOU ALL I LOVE YOU AND YOU WILL KNOW IT IS NO JOKE ♥

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