gyzym: (TROPES IN YOUR TROPES)
So! You have stumbled upon my journal. If you're here for the fic, congratulations! You've come to the right place. If you don't know about the fic: hello! I am [livejournal.com profile] gyzym, and I write fanfiction. Most of it is slash (male/male) fanfiction; if this is not your cup of tea, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, HEAD FOR THE HILLS.

All right, now that that's sorted, here's how this works: fic is divided by fandom and 'verse. Links and summaries and pairings are here; every link takes you to the top of the page in question, where you will find ratings, warnings, author's notes, etc. Please do not read anything rated R or higher if you are not of age where you live.

Hawaii 5-0 )

Inception )

Sherlock Holmes )

White Collar )

Harry Potter )

Veronica Mars )

On the Topic of Tags:
Yeah, um. I find it hilarious to use inane, random tags on my posts. Because, um. Because it is hilarious?

In any case, the tags that I use to streamline fic posting are (probably) all attached here.

On the Topic of Full Disclosure and Credit Where Credit is Due
Full disclosure: the username is an Allen Ginsberg reference; the journal title is from an e.e. cummings poem.

Additionally, I do not own any of the characters I play about with in my fanfiction, nor do I own most of the titles of said works--they're pulled from song lyrics, by and large. I'm not making any money from this, I have no intention of doing so, I claim no ownership of anything, and I don't mean to cause distress/offense/copyright infringement.

On the Topic of Problematic Elements in My Fiction
Should you find something, whilst reading one of my stories, that offends you/is incorrect/could offend others/is in any way problematic, please please please do not hesitate to tell me. I will never spew hate at you, I will never attack you, and I will always thank you for taking the time to let me know.

On the Topic of Non-Fic Things Discussed Herein
Sometimes I talk about my family! They're crazy, but generally in a hilarious way. Because my name, like it or not, has become Jizz/Jizzy (I really didn't mean to name myself after semen, I really didn't, I THOUGHT IT WAS AN INNOCENT ALLEN GINSBERG REFERENCE OKAY, I WAS YOUNG) a hilarious conversation ended up producing the following names for my brothers:

Burro Punch/Burro: My 19-year-old (frat boy) brother
Burrito Punch/Burrito: My 11-year-old (sixth grader) brother


Because...donkey punch...and ito is a...diminutive...anyway. THE POINT BEING, if I am referring to Burro&Burrito, they are my little brothers :D

Additionally, I have a non-fandom blog over on blogspot, called Illegible Address. It makes a concentrated effort to make it amusing; I'd love it if you guys felt like checking it out! Look, there's even an easy-click button:



On the Topic of Friending
By all means, feel free to friend me. Everything fandom related is public, and so is most everything else, though I don't post much that isn't fandom related these days. I always like meeting new people! I don't always friend back, which is NOT about you, but rather my utter inability to be responsible and proactive about replying to emails/notifications/whatever. It's a character flaw.

If you DO friend me, please do me the favor of dropping a hello into this post. I want to know what you're about! Also, I am often distracted by writing gay porn, and sometimes it takes me ages to actually pay attention to anything other than my bajillions of open Word documents. By which I mean: oh, god, you guys, I can be really terrible about answering comments, but that does not mean I am not a) reading them and b) feeling INSANE GRATITUDE towards anyone leaving them. I just, augh, I get all bogged down in writing and then it's been too long and I feel like an asshole and THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR ME, I AM SORRY.

Tl;dr summary? I'M KIND OF FLAKY SOMETIMES, BUT I DO ABSOLUTELY LOVE YOU ALL ♥
gyzym: (Steve/Danny b&w)
Riiiight, so. I sat down tonight to write a post-ep, because it's not really an ep for me until I've written something, because I'm nuts. Instead, I spent far too long watching next week's preview over and over, and then, er. Basically "Steve looked tired in this episode" and "what the hell is Steve doing sitting on a bench when there is WATER he could be SPLASHING IN (like the big puppy he is) RIGHT THERE," coalesced into. Uh. Writing a fic that I think is about PTSD without actually using the term PTSD? Kind-of-ish like Hills Like White Elephants, only not about abortion and not actually in anything like the same style and it kind of did its own thing without my go ahead and I'm, uh, reaaaaaaaally no Ernest Hemingway. In any number of ways, literary talent included.

In short: I have a pretty good idea of how this happened, but I don't really have any idea what it is, and I'm posting it. Whatever. BEGONE FROM MY FOLDER, FANFICTION, or something.

leave the weight in this place behind [steve/danny, 1800 words] )
gyzym: (Steve doubts you. He doubts you.)
Right, so, [livejournal.com profile] leupagus and [livejournal.com profile] wheres_walnut and I were talking about nerdy high school Steve, and somehow I accidentally ended up writing a little bit of Curving Like The Ocean Toward You 'verse nonsense. So...here's that!

Sorry, dudes, it's 4 in the morning, that's all I got right now.

Title: Maybe We're Both Too Far Gone
Rating: PG, except for, you know, all the fucking swearing, like always.
Wordcount: ~1900
Summary: A picture's worth a thousand words; a thousand and one, if there's a mullet involved.

Maybe We're Both Too Far Gone )
gyzym: (Danny (the face that goes with the tone))
Or, [livejournal.com profile] leupagus and I write insomnia fic together, because we're awesome like that. And/or because it was the only naturally place to go after we exhausted the topic of Scott Caan and his unholy love of the breast.

Two sleep-deprived fic writers babbling nonsense is totally better than one, am I right? )
gyzym: (Danny (the face that goes with the tone))
Sorry, did you want some h/c to go with your overwhelming amounts of glorious gay? Because that turns out to be what I'm in the mood for tonight. Post-ep for 1.20, spoilers obviously contained herein, title from the Avett Brothers' song The Day That Marvin Gaye Died. I have by and large stopped rating shit because it is TOO HARD YO, but, uh, this contains swearing and kissing but no sex? Proceed accordingly.

Title: trip on my words and land on my heart
Pairing: Steve/Danny
Wordcount: 2345
Summary: I love you is hard, and so is I'm sorry.

trip on my words and land on my heart )
gyzym: (Facepalm (Steve))
Alright, so, here's the deal: I'm 25K into a fic that isn't even half done, I have more or less forgotten what solid REM sleep feels like, there is a dude at the coffee place using TWO TABLES even though he is only one person, and I think I misplaced my sanity some time ago. I don't have a case of the Mondays so much as a case of the WHAT THE FUCKING HELLS, but! Who cares, who cares, who cares, because THERE IS A NEW 5-0 TONIGHT.

In honor of this, and because I needed to blow off some steam, please have:

Five Hawaii 5-0 Fics I'm Never Going to Write (That Someone Else Should Totally Write Instead) )

gyzym: (OH STEVE)
And now we celebrate the second birthday of the day, that of the truly excellent [livejournal.com profile] dogeared--and seriously, I'm just saying, April 10th is a pretty damn auspicious day what with all these awesome people being born on it, y'all better recognize. [livejournal.com profile] dogeared, love, here's a lazy Sunday morning, Steve & Danny style. I hope it is to your liking, and may you have the happiest of days. ♥

Everything Is Just Fine, Steve/Danny, PG, 852 words. )
gyzym: (Steve/Danny :D :D :D)
Getting in the car to go for coffee, will be back to answer comments shortly, but I just had to stop and say this. I was watching 1.13 over lunch today, eating the leftover bagel & lox I didn't finish at breakfast, and I discovered something I need to make sure you all know about.

In that first scene after the the theme song? You know, where Danny's getting Steve ice and knowing where everything is in his kitchen and lecturing him about the alarm system? Yeah, just in case you needed them to be even more married: while Danny is telling Kono that he's, he's been stunned, Steve, for a split second, makes the following face:

Under the cut because I had to take a shitty screepcap myself because it GOES BY THAT FAST. )
gyzym: (BBC Sherlock eyes)
Here's some shit in no particular order:

1) EEEEEE [livejournal.com profile] snowdarkred gifted me a pair of AWESOME HEADPHONES FOR MY PROFILE PAGE, THANK YOU BB, I LOVE THEM ♥ ♥ ♥!!!!

2) [livejournal.com profile] kissemdanno is open!! Guess where my insomnia drabbles are going to be for the next two weeks. KISSES, EVERYONE, WRITE THEM, OH MY GOD. If you need some inspiration, feel free to check out this sneak peak for Monday's H50, because JESUS CHRIST OH MY FUCKING GOD.

3) I'm working on a thing. I know there hasn't been as much fic as usual, but oh, man, believe me when I tell you, I am working on a thing. It'll be up...when it's done! But if the fic is a little bit sparse for the next week or two, that is why. I don't mean little ficlets, of course, I spit those out without really meaning to because I have a sickness, but the like, real full-length stuff. IT'S COMING, I SWEAR. I'M WORKING ON IT.

4) Speaking of fic, I wrote a Sherlock ficlet on tumblr for [livejournal.com profile] rrrowr that I'm reposting here, because I will, er, lose it over there. I know that sounds ridiculous, but there have already been like FOUR THINGS I POSTED OR REBLOGGED THAT I CAN'T FIND NOW. Tumblr eats souls and posts, so here's John and Sherlock immediately after The Great Game.

Wait, what, you want me to title things? WHAT EVEN ARE TITLES. I bite my thumb at you, sir! ...yeah I've maybe had some coffee today shut up. )
gyzym: (Can't sleep; write porn!)
This is some soppy sappy mushy feel-good three in the morning Steve/Danny nonsense, that's what this is right here. Porn not contained herein, insomnia icon applicable anyway. NO SHAME, NO APOLOGIES, NO REAL EXPLANATIONS. ♥

gathering )
gyzym: (OH STEVE)
At 1110 words, this isn't so much an insomnia ficlet as it is a really short insomnia fic! Hooray, or something. It gets a title and a header and all that jazz, I hope it is proud of itself. And look, [livejournal.com profile] sheafrotherdon, it's a warm fuzzy one and everything :D

Title: when your boots are well worn in
Pairing: Steve/Danny
Rating: G/PG, unless you count the assorted foul language.
Summary: Steve's sick, Danny knows it, and "Fuck you," like "Book 'em Danno," is mostly a term of endearment.

when your boots are well worn in )
gyzym: (O(wl)TP! God I love hermette.)


[livejournal.com profile] gyzym:
DUDE
DUDE
HOLD UP
IT'S THE TEAM +JENNA
AS PENGUINS.

[livejournal.com profile] leupagus:
YEAH IT IS
STEVE AND KONO IN FRONT
DANNY IN THE MIDDLE BITCHING
CHIN'S ON THEIR SIX
JENNA'S.. GOT A HUNCHBACK?

[livejournal.com profile] gyzym:
JENNA'S A LITTLE DISTRACTED

[livejournal.com profile] leupagus:
IT HAPPENS

[livejournal.com profile] gyzym:
SHE'S LOOKING FOR WO FAT

[livejournal.com profile] leupagus:
He's the photographer in the distance
ENEMY PHOTOG

[livejournal.com profile] gyzym:
DUN DUN DUN DUNNNNN
THE SECRET INGREDIENT IS LURKING

[livejournal.com profile] leupagus:
THREE YEARS AGO HE TOOK A PICTURE OF MY FIANCE

[livejournal.com profile] gyzym:
JFDGJHDFJKGDF
STEVE IS LIKE
THOSE FEATHERS YOU WORE
PLAYING GROWN-UPS IN MY OFFICE
PROBABLY COST YOU TWO WHOLE FISH

[livejournal.com profile] leupagus:
ALSO ACCURATE PORTRAYAL OF STEVE/DANNY DYNAMIC:



[livejournal.com profile] leupagus:
I would feel shame except my shamedar got broken at muskrat jamboree

[livejournal.com profile] gyzym:
NO SHAME.

[livejournal.com profile] leupagus:
ONLY PENGUINS
gyzym: (Can't sleep; write porn!)
Tried for bed, couldn't manage it, here's some Kono/Jenna schmoop! I am going to try to sleep again now, fingers crossed that it sticks. I assume it goes without saying that if I awaken to find lady-bashing, I will quash it thoroughly and without mercy. Yes? Yes.

possibly this will get a title in the morning when i am more awake )
gyzym: (Umbrella girl!)
1. sdjfhjsdkfhdsjkfhsdjk jfdshfgjksdhfdshfgdsh you guys [livejournal.com profile] aphelant podficced two of my fics! She did i'll see you when the sun sets east (don't forget me), the Inception fic where Arthur & Eames are in limbo, and that H50 ficlet where Danny sleeps so hard he left a bruise, which I didn't title because I'm asshole. And she also did a truly magnificent rendition of [livejournal.com profile] weatherfront's You're Waiting for an Orgasm, and oh my god, you guys, dsjfhdsjkfhkds THEY ARE AMAZING, THEY ARE ALL SO AMAZING. I'm always just floored when someone wants to podfic my stuff, and these are just. I can't even, she did things with the effects in i'll see you when the sun sets east that are just, oh my god, so much better than the actual fic. AMAZEBALLS. A-MAZE-BALLS.

2. It's [livejournal.com profile] hermette's birthday for another 10 minutes (GETTING THIS IN UNDER THE WIRE YES I AM), and she is SO GOOD TO ME ALWAYS AND THE BEST EVER, so I wrote her a ficlet about Danny and Steve being stupid in love with each other in the morning. HAPPY BIRTHDAY BB. ALL OF MY LOVE. ♥

you're a beautiful and violent word )
gyzym: (Facepalm (Steve))
Right, so, yesterday--WAS IT ONLY YESTERDAY, JESUS CHRIST, I FEEL LIKE TUMBLR IS A TIME VORTEX AND YOU WANDER IN AND NEVER LEAVE--[livejournal.com profile] arineat was like, I feel like drawing rooster Steve and rooster Danny! And I was like PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO THAT I WILL WRITE YOU A FICLET, and SHE DID OH MY GOD :D :D :D. (AND THEN SHE GOT ME A SNAIL BECAUSE SHE IS THE BEST PERSON EVER.)

And then I wrote...uh...this, which is not about Danny and Steve as roosters so much as about domesticity and dreams and bad puns and Steve being a failboat. I don't even know. THIS IS NOT REAL FIC, SORRY RINNY, YOU DESERVE BETTER, I HOPE YOU ARE NOT TOO APPALLED AT ME FOR THIS.

this ficlet does not deserve a title, but if it was going to get one, it would be [PLEASE INSERT YOUR FAVORITE COCK JOKE HERE] )
gyzym: (THIS CLAM THINKS I AM TOO HAPPY)
DFJSDLFHJDKFHDSJKLFHDSKFSD

SFHJSDKFHJSDKFHDSJKFHSDJFKSD

I WILL BE BACK TO DO A REAL POST LATER BUT DSFHSDJKFHSDFJJDSKF

[livejournal.com profile] wheres_walnut DID HAWAII 5-0 ART


FDFJKHSFJKSDF THE OTHER DAY, I SAID WALNUTTTTT, DANNY/STEVE ARRRRRRRT, AND SHE SAID WHAT KIND OF ART, AND I SAID HEY, LOOK, I WOULD BE HAPPY IF YOU DREW THEM WATCHING PAINT DRY, OKAY, THAT IS HOW MUCH I LOVE YOUR ART, AND SO

SHE

DREW

THEM

WATCHING

PAINT

DRY

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SERIOUSLY MY DAY, MY DAY IS MADE, MY DAY IS SO MADE, MY WEEK AND MONTH AND YEAR ARE MADE, WALNUT I KNOW YOU ARE STARING AT YOUR COMPUTER SCREEN IN ABJECT HORROR AT THIS POST AND I AM SORRY, BUT MY GLEE, IT SPANS WORLDS. WORLDS. DANNY'S ARM IS ON STEVE'S LEG OH MY GOD THE SANDWICHES OH MY GOD I'M GOING TO DIE OF HAPPINESS RIGHT HERE IN THIS CHAIR JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.

SEE THAT CLAM IN MY ICON? YEAH, THAT CLAM WAS NOT ONLY A HAPPY CLAM, IT WAS HAPPY AS A CLAM, BUT NOW IT'S LOOKING AT ME AND MAKING THAT FACE AND SAYING "CHRIST, I THOUGHT I KNEW FROM HAPPY, BUT I WILL TELL YOU WHAT, THAT BITCH IS HAPPY AS FUCK." HFDSJFHSDJKFHSDKJFHSDJKFHDSJKFHS ♥ ♥ ♥ !!!!!!!!!
gyzym: (Cardinal (Ohio))
RIGHT SO FIRST: INCEPTION FEN. INCEPTION FEN. LISTEN UP.

Okay, I know I rec [livejournal.com profile] wheres_walnut's art like, all the fucking time, like every time she posts art, I know I do that, I really do. I AM AWARE. But the thing is I do it because it is, every time, blow the fuck away good, and oh my god, you guys. She is doing an art WIP (an ART WIP!!!) over at the kinkmeme where Arthur & Eames are fellow commuters on the Metro North and, you guys, Jesus Christ. Look, I know fuck-all about art aside from WOW THAT'S SO GORGEOUS DJHASFJKSDF but the thing I always love love love about Walnut's art is how goddamn real it feels, her use of color to set the mood, this vivid expansive beyond-what-I-can-articulate scene she manages to build. Even if you are not in Inception fandom and this, to you, would be two random dudes on a train, GO LOOK. THEY WILL BE THE MOST BREATHTAKING TWO DUDES ON A TRAIN YOU'VE EVER SEEN.

/embarrassing Walnut (SORRY NUT, I CANNOT CONTAIN MY LOVE AT ALL).

And, ahahaha, okay, second: so, when I first started posting fanfiction, I said to myself, "Jizz. Jizz. You can feel free to pound out whatever nonsense you like, so long as--and this is very important--you never write fic set in or around Cleveland, Ohio." This is for a lot of reasons, the predominant one being that I grew up/live here and thus have deep fear of self insert, though there's also the fear that my unlikely but undeniable love for this place will grip me so furiously that I'll never be able to set anything anywhere else ever again. Whatever the reason, "Don't write fic about Ohio" has been the "TOUCH NOTHING BUT THE LAMP" of my fanfiction career, and I have observed the rule faithfully.

But, see, tonight [livejournal.com profile] sheafrotherdon posted this vid about Michigan and, because I grew up in Ohio, Michigan makes me think of University of Michigan makes me think of Muck Fichigan makes me think of the Ohio State Buckeyes makes me think of buckeye candy makes me think of my childhood makes me think of home, and so my brain...went there. It went there, and to continue the Aladdin analogy this idea is like that giant ruby and I am Abu and somewhere my common sense is screaming NO YOU ASSHOLE TOUCH NOTHING BUT THE LAMP DO NOT WRITE FIC ABOUT OHIO, but I. I can't help myself.


What is happening to me right now. For serious.


So under the cut are some random context-free snippets of Danny and Steve in Northeast Ohio because of [plot device I haven't worked out], in the hopes that it will get the fuck out of my system. This is not fanfiction, it is 1500 words of fucking about on the internet. THAT'S TOTALLY DIFFERENT. I'M NOT TOUCHING THE LAMP. IF I DON'T GIVE IT A TITLE IT'S NOT REAL. Oh god.

Pumpkin picking, a Browns game, a sleepy drive, a thunderstorm, and a cardinal. )
gyzym: (Term of endearment)
This is the first chapter of a fucking Princess Bride AU that I am apparently going to post serially, I honestly, I don't even know what else to say, oh my god, this is so ridiculous, this is straight up unmitigated crack, please understand that I mean it only as crack. Crack. Craaaaaack. I DO NOT TAKE THIS STORY SERIOUSLY AT ALL AND NEITHER SHOULD YOU, IS MY POINT.

Also, I've kind of changed. Um. Some things. A lot of things. And the summary is for the overall story even though it's not all actually written yet because the hell if I'm writing a summary for every chapter because I HATE SUMMARIES and oh, god, I'm just going to stop talking now. EXCEPT TO SAY THAT I BLAME [livejournal.com profile] iam_space FOR PLANTING THE IDEA AND [livejournal.com profile] hermette FOR ENCOURAGING IT AND [livejournal.com profile] leupagus FOR DEMANDING I WRITE IT FASTER. Seriously. It's their fault. It's not mine.

Title: Totally Not A Kissing Book - Chapter One
Pairing: Steve/Danny
Rating: PG-13, but really only for language
Summary: Danny's the hottest guy in Florin, Steve's a lunatic, Kono's a bad ass, and Chin doesn't get paid enough for this shit. So really, nothing's changed at all.

Totally Not A Kissing Book - Chapter One )

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gyzym

July 2011

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