children of the 90s, rise up

[gyzym]

This is a drive-by post; I will be back later to answer comments (oh my god I love you guys have I mentioned that recently) and probably to make a fjdsfjdshf post about last night's ep.

BUT IN THE MEANTIME:

Me: Do you remember the Gator Golf commercial from when we were kids?
Burro: What the fuck is Gator Golf?
Me: *Sings the Gator Golf jingle*
Waiters in the Restaurant: *Side-eye me so hard I'm surprised nobody hurt themselves*
Burro: Nope, not ringing a bell.
Me: Seriously? This song's been stuck in my head for 17 years and you've got nothing?
Burro: Hahahahaha 17 years, your life blows.
Me: You're not helping.
Burro: You're beyond help.

THE GATOR GOLF COMMERCIAL, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN:

Guys. I ask you. I plead with you. Leave the scraps of terrible 90s commercials you remember in the comments. Link me to YouTube vids, embed shit, tell me how to access the mp3 files. THIS IS A CALL TO ARMS: I CANNOT TORTURE BURRO BY MYSELF, AND HE NEEDS TO BE TORTURED. For the sake of nostalgia. For the sake of my pride. For the sake of long-suffering older sisters everywhere.

ETA from the car on our way to spring Burrito from school:

Burro: Dude, I'm such a fucking bum right now, this hoodie isn't even clean.
Me: Yeah, man. My sweatshirt's clean, but my shoes totally don't match right now.
Burro: YOUR SHOES DON'T MATCH?!
Me: Yeah, what's the--oh my god, you asshole, I meant they don't match my outfit, they match EACH OTHER, what is wrong with you?
Burro: Don't look at me like that. You think I forgot how you used to dress in high school?

IF I DIDN'T LOVE HIM SO MUCH I'D HATE HIM, YOU GUYS. He must paaaaaaay.

Comments

[fic-kitty.livejournal.com]

I remember being desperately jealous of one of my friends as a kid because she had freaking Polly Pocket. NOW I HAVE NO IDEA WHY.

[winslow-arizona.livejournal.com]

I had Polly Pocket. We donated them to charity...well, mostly. I discovered that Polly had left behind her pet otter (I don't know either) when I stepped on it in the dark. Those little plastic things hurt like hell.

[robanybody.livejournal.com]

I was too old for Polly Pocket by the time she came out, so these commercials just irritated me with the jingles and the frothy pinkness of it all.

I didn't even link to all the horrific toy commercials that scarred me for life. Like all those baby dolls that peed when you fed them water or the Littlest Pet Shop animals.

[fic-kitty.livejournal.com]

I WON'T LINK YOU if it truly scars you BUT THE THING IS. I went? and did a search? on youtube? and apparently they are STILL MAKING THE LITTLEST PET SHOP TOYS.

The franchise liiiives....

[robanybody.livejournal.com]

I KNOW. I watch Teletoon Retro for all my goddamn nostalgia cartoons (Beetlejuiiiiiiiiiiiiice!) and I see commercials for it ALL THE TIME. It's like being high without the benefit of actually taking drugs. >.>

[gyzym.livejournal.com]

OH MY GOD THERE IS A PLACE WHERE I CAN STILL WATCH MOTHERFUCKING BEETLEJUICE?!

[robanybody.livejournal.com]

IN CANADA, YES. The Teletoon Retro network made my life by airing Beetlejuice, The Real Ghostbusters, Thundercats and She-Ra.

[gyzym.livejournal.com]

CANADA IS A MAGICAL PLACE OH MY GODDDDD

TELL ME YOU REMEMBER THIS SHOW.

[robanybody.livejournal.com]

Because I legitimately think I hallucinated it:



(Also, sorry for the double comments. Answering LJ on my Blackberry is a bitch.)

Re: TELL ME YOU REMEMBER THIS SHOW.

[gyzym.livejournal.com]

OH MY GOD, YES I REMEMBER THIS FUCKING SHOW. My mother used to try to forbid me and Burro from watching it because we would be so riled up afterwards, dfhdjsfsdfs god THIS SHOW AND ROCKO'S MODERN LIFE, OH MY GOD, I MISS THEM SO MUCH.

Re: TELL ME YOU REMEMBER THIS SHOW.

[robanybody.livejournal.com]

Oh, God, ROCKO'S MODERN LIFE. And Ren and Stimpy. I still sing that goddamn Log song all the time. Cartoons in the '90s were so fucking bizarre and awesome, and none of the newer ones even come CLOSE to capturing that kind of insane magic.

Do you remember Hey Arnold! at all? I loved that show so much. HIS HEAD WAS SHAPED LIKE A FOOTBALL. BEN 10 DOESN'T HAVE THAT KIND OF BRILLIANCE.

Re: TELL ME YOU REMEMBER THIS SHOW.

[gyzym.livejournal.com]

OH MY FUCKING GOD HEY ARNOLD IS ON NETFLIX AND MY BABY BROTHER IS OBSESSED WITH IT, HE THINKS HE LIKE ~DISCOVERED~ SOMETHING, IT WARMS MY HEARTTTTT

Re: TELL ME YOU REMEMBER THIS SHOW.

[robanybody.livejournal.com]

HEEEEEEE. YOUR FAMILY = AWESOME.

[fic-kitty.livejournal.com]

WHEN I FIRST CAME TO CANADA AND REALIZED that there was a channel DEVOTED TO RETRO CARTOONS I was like o________o truly this is my motherland.

[robanybody.livejournal.com]

I will never live anywhere else for PRECISELY this reason.